1000 mascaras: Maybelline Illegal Length

Wed, Oct 9, 2013 1:25AM

Illegal Length is the first of likely a few fibre technologies I’ll try.  The idea is that instead of painted your lashes, the product uses some synthetic material layered on the end of your lashes to add colour and length.  It promises no flaking.

The idea sounds good, but there are some issues with the formula.  It’s quite dry (and as a result affects the comfort a bit – I found my eyes to be ever-so-slightly dry), and as a result I think what’s happening is that any bump to the lashes causes the mascara to flake off like needles on a month-old Christmas tree.

This theory comes out of the fact that it tends to be my right eye that ends up flaky by midday, which is the side on which my long bangs fall, likely touching my lashes on occasion.

I still have faith in the premise though; it could be this formula is just too wimpy.  There are some other brands offering something similar, which I’ll try soon.

(Note: Kiss Me mascara – which is now called Blinc Blinc – uses this idea, which is what I wore for my wedding and that stuff is a SURVIVOR.  Like the Lancome options, it’s super expensive, so I haven’t tried it outside of that one time, so I can’t rightly comment on it with any authority yet.  But at the rate I’m going, I just might splurge on a tube (no pun intended) and see.)


1000 mascaras: Lancome Definicils

Wed, Oct 2, 2013 9:31AM

Huh, I’m surprised I haven’t talked about this one yet.

Fortunately for me, my mother-in-law loves department-store skin products.   Why does that affect me?  Well, she often gets free make up samples, but isn’t so big on make up so for a while she was passing them onto me.  (My sister-in-law is currently getting a turn with the free stuff.  Fair enough.)

I’ve tried 2 Lancome mascaras among these free samples: one hit, one miss.


The Hit: Lancome Definicils

Although I do still love Cover LashBlast Length, Definicils goes one step further for coverage and volume while still coming pretty close to matching LashBlast Length’s longevity and comfort.  Yes, I still have to wipe away some raccoon eyes by end of day, but for the most part, this one might be the best overall mascara to date.  Unfortunately though, it costs a minor fortunate so I’m not ready to settle on it being my mascara of choice.


The Miss: Lancome Hypnose

This one intends on focusing on volume, and I don’t know if it’s just me but volume seems to equate to clumpy runny mess.  Sure, it might not be the worst volume mascara I’ve tried so far, but it didn’t make it past midday, so this one is out.



1000 mascaras: Revlon Overtime

Wed, Sep 25, 2013 11:11AM

The first couple of uses of Revlon’s Overtime mascara left me feeling hopeful.  It coated my lashes thickly, and it seemed to hang in there all day long.  At the end of the day, removal was quick and easy.

But after just a few days, something odd started happening to the formula.  It got really thick and REALLY clumpy.  It got so thick and clumpy that after a week or so, it was very difficult to apply.  I use a metal lash comb (Sephora), and even that had difficulty splitting up the clumps.

After a month or so, the mascara became unusable so I had to toss it.

You might think I picked up a lemon or something, but I bought this mascara in a 2-for-1 deal, and after trying the second bottle with the same results, I felt confident declaring this product to be not the mascara I’m looking for.



1-minute album review: Toots and the Maytals

Wed, Jan 2, 2013 10:10AM

I’ve been horribly slack with my minute reviews this year.  I never get time to listen to new music anymore!  As a result, I’m ashamed to say I wrote all of ONE music review in 2012.  Eesh.

For you keeners who actually counted on me spreading the word of great music, I’ll point you to Jonk Music’s countdown to find out what else happened in 2012.

So I’m kind of out of touch with new music, but what I can do, however, is tell you about some great bands you might not yet have discovered.  The first one, of course, is Toots & the Maytals.

Hey, guess what?  There’s more to reggae than your Bob Marley greatest hits CD!  Bob Marley is good, but he’s kind of to reggae what Backstreet Boys are to pop: goes down easy, great for a nice summer day.  Quality stuff, but not quite representative of all there is in the genre.

A couple of years ago, I was listening to CBC Radio 2’s Drive program, and they played Pressure Drop.  Simple but soulful, catchy but raw.  I loved it and immediately checked out the band.

Turns out they started in the mid-60s and are actually really well known.  How’d I miss that?  Well anyway, better late than never.

I find Toots is my new go-to band.  Whereas most albums I listen to a few times and then never touch again, when I’m not in the mood for a random shuffle and need something really good, I put this on.  Maybe it’s because it’s refreshingly different.  It’s edgy without being dark.  It’s effortless with just enough R&B to get me grooving.

Now that I’ve gotten to know the greatest hits well, I plan on diving into the full lengths to see what I’ve missed. I’m convinced this is a band that has a ton of stuff they couldn’t fit on the greatest hits album, but which would have been worthy.

Check out: Pressure Drop, Funky Kingston and 54-46 Was My Number (below)


You’re never too old for Xmas magic

Thu, Dec 6, 2012 10:35AM

I’m a bit of a Scrooge when it comes to Xmas.  It’s loud, it’s noisy, it’s crowds, it’s commercialism, it’s complaining children, it’s overspending, it’s overeating…. Okay, maybe I don’t mind that last one so much, but in general, Xmas is just a bit too much for me.

A big reason is likely because of how tense a time Xmas was growing up.  My mom was an elementary school secretary supporting 4 young girls on her own, and December meant 3 things: not enough money to keep up with the Jones’, crowds and chaos (my mom is a RAGING introvert) and report cards.  (Unless you know someone well in the education system, you might not get that last one, but trust me: you did NOT talk to my mom during report card time.)

Anyway, when I first started dating Mr. Chatty, I tried hard to convince him that with all the other gift giving we were obligated to do, we should skip giving Xmas gifts to each other.  He tried to go along with that plan, but it brought him great sadness.  For Mr. Chatty, Xmas is EVERYTHING.  It’s music, it’s loved ones, it’s parties, it’s drinking, it’s gifts, it’s singing, it’s sappy TV specials, it’s jazzy decorations, it’s magic.

So, I sucked it up, and we do Xmas gifts.

Buying gifts for Mr. Chatty is challenging.  It’s been mandated that I MUST buy off The List, and any attempts at creative outside-the-box thinking has resulted in near tears and certain returns.

I learned that lesson early and have obeyed well enough these past 4 years together, but this year I simply had to veer from instruction.

Every time (and I’m talking EVERY TIME) Mr. Chatty and I would go to Zone (a funky kitchen-bath-and-what-not store downtown), Mr. Chatty would yearn for these: a set of smiley-face cheese knives.

A bit ironic considering Mr. Chatty’s campaign against cheese eating (he’s a health nut), but the dude cannot resist anything with a happy face on them.

We’d go into the store and each time Mr. Chatty would nearly squeal with glee, giggling back at the knives as he no doubt imagined them giggling at him.

But Mr. Chatty is a man of utmost practically and never purchased them.  So this year, I did.

I gave them to him last night since we serve cheese in the house exactly once a year for Mr. Chatty’s Xmas Open House, which is this Sunday.  I was nervous as I knew I had broken the gift purchasing rule and had bought something not on The List.

The risk paid off.  Never have I seen Mr. Chatty’s face light up like that.  He was overjoyed, as if 4 long-lost friends had shown up unexpectedly on his doorstep.  And then he giggled.

I suppose sometimes Xmas isn’t so bad after all.  :)


1000 mascaras: fix the problem, not the symptom

Tue, Sep 11, 2012 12:35PM

I was happy when I realised I didn’t have to spend the next couple of years (and the next couple of pay cheques) trying to find a mascara that would suffice.   My CoverGirl LashBlast Length does the job, although I was still left with a few problems:

  • The formula could only do so much with the length of my stubby lashes
  • My lashes kept falling out, particularly when I remove my make up, causing thinning
  • My lashes were becoming much like the rest of my aging hair: kinky and crusty.  Often I’d get a lash bending directly into my eye.  Not fun.

So I did some research and came across RapidLash.

And holy cow, did that stuff not totally solve my problems?  Oh ya, it sure did.

Now, RapidLash isn’t going to be for everyone.  Within my bag of inflammation tricks is a condition that causes extreme dryness.  My theory is that RapidLash acts as a deep conditioner for your eye lashes, resulting in plump, smooth and shiny lashes.

I can wash off my make up now without losing a dozen or so lashes, and when I don’t wear mascara, you can tell that I really do have eye lashes.  (Never ruled out as a possibility otherwise ever since a former boyfriend of a sister once did this weird thing once where he cut off his lashes because they were “bugging him”.  Um okay, buddy.)

So if your lashes are feeling dry, crinkly, bendy or stubby, you might want to try RapidLash.  Just be ready to fork out a hefty $50 or so (which lasts several months).


Memo to the world

Fri, Sep 7, 2012 10:28AM

Hey, world.  Guess what?  You’re not off the hook for memos either.  I’m at the point of acceptance with my dumb-assness and would rather spend my time focusing on yours.

Let’s get started.


Memo to the world: Yield does not mean “other guy stops and lets you in”

Too often I see some twerp at a yield sign flailing his arms in anger that people aren’t letting him in.  Same goes for twerps coming out of driveways and parking lots.

Twerps of the world: please wait for an opening before proceeding.  It’s the LAW.

Too often I see some twit FULL STOP on a street while he lets in a twerp at a yield sign or coming out of a driveway.  Particularly fun is when a twit slows to a near stop ON THE HIGHWAY to let some twerp in from an on ramp.

Think you’re being nice, twit?  WRONG.  You’re causing accidents.

Cut it out, and learn how to drive.


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